Jess Own it

Embrace the one who sees you when everything unfolds, revealing the blemishes, the flaws, and the open wounds. Love has no color, but she will surely find her king.

Jess One of Those Days

It’s something about the depth of his dark

The melanin of his skin, the strength of his bark  

I swear to you it humbles me each time 

I look into him and see sunshine

I see love, I see him, I see me and I see them

I bend at my knees to show respect to him  

My king let me taste you… pour your royalty to the brim

Don’t bring me up until your ready, you’re ready to see me 

And when you’re ready, baby please, just love and protect me.

So on my knees for my king ….

Its just a position for me

A position where I get to show  humility.

Because no one in this world ever appreciates you

or show you this love like this queen could do 

The mix of our melanins …Im destined for you

A black man of dark skin with the…

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Are you hitting the snooze button on your goals?

Hey you!

This have been on my mind for a few days now, maybe because this relates so close to me. We all have goals or plans that are scattered in our heads or written out somewhere. Well, I have goals, many of them to be exact. I don’t know how I plan to accomplish them all, but I know I have to get them done, even if that means a few months or a year from now.

My goals for this year are very broad and very specific. I do them that way, so I won’t feel too bad about me not accomplishing some of them when I reflect on them later. Although I wrote my goals down at the end of 2017, I have been hitting the snooze button on some of them. For example, I plan on going to nursing school. This have been a goal of mine for the longest. I mean the longest. I graduated back in 2016. Yes, little me holds a bachelor’s degree, but I plan on using those with my nursing degree, so I have put them on the back burner for now. So, last year I was on the steady momentum of getting things done. I had everything planned out (in my head) of what I need to do to progress. Some time in September, I took an entry exam in order to get into a program I was looking at. As I said, I was very determined. I thought I had prepared myself enough, having much confidence of knowing I was going to pass. Well reality hit me in the face and I failed. I was devastated because I was sure I did better than expected. It’s because of that and the fear of failing that I’m constantly hitting the snooze button on this dream of mine. You know with the snooze button, you have about 10 minutes to hold off on whatever needs to get done, then the alarm sounds getting you back to reality.  And we, I especially, get comfortable hitting the snooze button because I know I will get there eventually. Have anyone ever been there?

If you constantly hit the snooze button on your goals, how long will it take you to accomplish them. Imagine if we just do all the things we say we were going to do the first time, without procrastinating, where would we be? We are all serious about accomplishing something, if not anything, we just have to learn how to take the step.

Let’s talk for a minute. How many things have you put on hold because you were scared you weren’t going to succeed? I will be the first to say there are 4 things or even more. Then I look at all the people who are where I want to be and ask how did they get there? Not by hitting the snooze button time and time again. Here’s a challenge, the next time you think about your dreams, don’t be so quick to hold them off because you can actually succeed with a little patience and elbow grease. Promise yourself not to wait and just do it.

Words left unsaid

Hey You!

The words you’re about to read might make you shed a tear here and there but hold on till the end.

Have someone close to you passed away without saying their finals goodbyes? Have you ever wondered what they would have said if he or she would have gotten that chance? Well… here it goes.

Although my time here can stop at any minute, there is something I have to tell you. I want you to know I’m very proud of you. You’ve accomplished so much and you’re still going. I don’t know how. The challenges you face now are preparing you for something greater. I know you have heard that before, but it’s true. You know what l’ve been through and look where I’m at now. I didn’t get here without challenges and you’re not either. I want you to use my life as an example to do everything i didn’t do. Learn from my mistakes. Just promise me as life goes on you will always try no matter what. When people tell you no or you’re not going to make it in whatever you choose to do, simply say okay and find another way to get there. There’s many options, find what works best for you. If you have to get there in different levels, that’s okay but don’t give up. Remember you have people around who really cares about you, don’t be so hard on yourself and lean on them. At times, you might feel as if they don’t care, but they really do. They have their problems like yours. Please don’t shut them out.

I have to say thank you but also sorry because I know this is difficult for you although it’s very much difficult for me. We have been together ever since day one and often have our daily conversations when everyone is sleeping. I’m going to miss those. I have to be fast because the knock is getting louder and the light is getting brighter. On your most proudest days, I’m going to be there. You might see not me, but I’m there. The day you decide to have children I’m going to be there every step of the way. When you get start to get frustrated, I’m going to calm you down. You might not feel me, but i’m touching you. Those lonely nights when the tears won’t stop, I’m holding you. I’m still with you. When you feel a little breeze on a sunny day, that’s me simply saying hi. The tears are coming and they’re coming fast. I didn’t want to cry, but I have to say I don’t want to go not yet. I want to see you accomplish any and everything. I just want to be here with you. Just like you need me, I need you… I’m so sorry this is so short, but I have to go. I promise we will meet again and catch up like we never left. I love you for now and see you soon.

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I’m sorry if you got a little emotional while reading this. One of my favorite person’s didn’t get to say goodbye to me. I’m pretty sure there were a lot of thoughts roaming around inside, but we wouldn’t have known. I don’t know if these are the exact words that would have been spoken, but I know there would have been some laughter along the way.

This is a touchy subject that we often push underneath the rug, so let’s talk.

How have you dealt with grief before or are you currently experience it? If you had something to say to someone who is no longer here, what would you say? If they didn’t get to say goodbye, what do you think they would say?

 

I Just want to be successful

Hey You!

Some of us wants to be successful so bad that we will literally do anything. We are around a lot of successful people who seem to just get it without having much failure. That’s what we think? See, in our world today, we have various “focal” media – I say focal because people think what we see on social media about other people is the real thing – like Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and others. We don’t see the long lonely nights, the failures, the start overs, and the try again. We don’t see the tears, the frustrations, the misunderstanding of family and friends, the notebooks of affirmations and a hopeful road map of success. We don’t see none of that! All we see are people that simply have it, with the constant imagination of how did he or she did it? Don’t forget that successful isn’t formed in a completely straight line. Success is like that strand of hair that doesn’t want to be tamed after trying to lay it down so many times. Or it’s like hitting the snooze button one more time to get an extra few minutes of sleep before you really have it get up. To me, success isn’t planned because anything can happen. Just because a person say they are going to be successful doesn’t mean it’s going to happen, at least not when they say it. You know why because many of us have the idea but we don’t know how to put those thoughts into action. Your ideas are free although your actions might have to pay a little. So you want to be successful right? Just how bad do you want it? The next time you think about wanting to be successful try these things:

  1. Do something different, break your normal routine. With the routine we have, this allows us to be comfortable, Now you know everything happens outside our comfort zone. If you always watch television, read a book. If you always go to bed late, go to be an hour early. If you find something that interest you, give it a try. What more could happen?
  2. Have someone you admire, ask them about what they do and how they do it. Conversations are a right tool to learning about someone. You have to ask those awkward questions… how did you overcome failure? How did you not let that stop you? If you could give one advice, what would that be? What can I learn from you? It might be intimidating at first because you don’t know what the person is thinking, but I bet they were in the same place you were.
  3. Have positive thoughts, it makes a difference. The mind is a powerful tool that allows a person to think negatively so easily. Don’t think about other people’s journey, think about your own. You are in no competition with anyone but yourself. Always remain focused on your ultimate goal.
  4. Listen to something motivational, there is someone out there worth listening to. Podcasts are a right way to get a person motivated about their success. When you are getting dress in the morning, listen a motivational speaker instead of listening to music. This will set the tone for the day. There are many ways to find these speakers, Youtube, Sound cloud, Apple podcasts and different areas.
  5. Have fun. Not everything is going to be glamour and gold, but it’s important to have fun in the process because that is when things will turn around for the better and become more enjoyable.  People want to see you having fun, which attracts attention.

Let’s have a conversation. What are you doing to become more successful in the future? If you have any setbacks or any discouraging thoughts that have made you think you can not be successful, how did you block them? Who inspires you to want to be a better person? You can be successful, just be willing to work hard when others party.

 

Julie

 

Stay quiet but keep moving

Hey you!

If you want do anything, you can simply achieve it! I say this because many people feel stuck in their current state of mind or situation. “I have to work this job in order for me to have this.”  “I don’t know how to do that because I wasn’t trained.” You don’t have to work a job that you dread everyday. It’s not healthy for you and the people around you. When you feel trapped in a place, it will eventually take a toll on you, which you might not see it but other people will. And you don’t have to be trained to do something, sometimes we have to learn as we go. The greatest leaders are lifetime learners. Always be willing to learn and grow. I always say allow the job you are at now to be a stepping stone for something else because it’s really temporary if you think about it. You can be the hardest worker, but your job doesn’t need you anymore, they can give you the boot. What will do from there. There are endless opportunities for you to become the next Steve Jobs or the next [insert your name here]. You never know what tomorrow will bring. The decision to simply try could and will open many doors. I commend entrepreneurs because they aren’t afraid to say yes when others tell them no. They aren’t afraid to fail, they aren’t afraid to feel or be lonely, etc because they know their circumstances are only temporary and something greater will eventually happen. You know all it takes is one time for something to happen and someone is a success story, whether if it’s you living in a car for a few years to being able to build your own house cash down. Okay, maybe this is a little extreme but it’s definitely possible. You are in control of your life, not anyone else. If tomorrow you wake up and want to be a writer or an artist, it can happen. But I also want you to know, nothing worth it comes easy. You are going to fail. You are going to go in the wrong direction. You are going to have a few or many setbacks, but you cannot give up. Life is not a linear equation. Things don’t always go up instantly. We have a lot of loop holes, a lot of doubts and fears.

Don’t be so quick to tell your “friends” what you are doing because they might congratulate you upfront but wish bad on you at the end of the day. Some people are stuck in their situation and want you to be stuck too. They don’t want you to pass them and make a living out of yourself.  Stay quiet and keep moving because not everyone needs to know what you are doing. This is your life. Not everyone wants to see you win. There are many successful people who have kept quiet about their moves and look where they are now. Somewhere different from where they used to be. Now, they are enjoying life.

Maturity taught me I have to make decisions for me and no one else. I’m allowed to be happy with the accomplishments I have achieved. I don’t need confirmation from anyone to do what I want to do. You can care for others but care for yourself too. Hard work and determination are the various keys to success. Not everyone will like you, not everyone will cheer you on. You are allowed to do anything as long as you are willing to work for it. Sometimes you have to stay quiet when you simply want to express yourself.

I challenge you to think about your goals. Are your friends really encouraging you without having ill intentions. Do you have to announce everything that is happening. Whenever is said and done, who is still in corner? How can you do something different that will have a greater impact on you tomorrow or years from now. Create a road map and conquer your dreams one plan at a time.

Sending loves and hugs,

Julie

 

 

 

Let’s talk about… consistency

Hey You!

Today is a new day and a new month. I can’t believe we are officially three months within the new year. Where did January and February go? Some would say those are our trails months right? March is the month where we are focused, consistent, and hone our skills. I have to tell you a little a secret. As much as I like to do a lot of things and am accomplishing some them, I’m not very consistent with everything I do. The spark or anticipation that awaits when I have the idea of doing something dies quickly after I start them. So the things I want to do just sit in a holding state after it is executed, which is really bad because so much could prosper if we just stay consistent when things don’t go our way or become challenging.

Because this is day 1 of a new month, I’m challenging myself to stay consistent with blogging for the whole month of March. I know it’s going to be difficult, but I know I can do it if I just take each day one step at a time. When something becomes consistent in our life, we tend to keep at it to perfect any minor errors, which eventually creates a habit if I’m not mistaken.

Don’t be afraid to try something new, but once you start it, stick with it for a little while to see where you end up within two to three months time. Being consistent is what shows the different between someone being successful in the long run and someone being successful for a short time.

I challenge you to be consistent for the whole month for March. I know it’s not going to be peaches and cream, but there’s a reason for everything even if we don’t see it right now. So, let’s write down our goals for the month and see which ones we can execute effectively. For the ones we don’t accomplish, we will just carry them over onto April.

I would like to know what challenges you face with being consistent in different areas of your life. Let’s communicate and start a conversation!

Sending loves and hugs,

Julie

 

 

Congratulations!!

Image result for congratulations lyrics

Hey You!

I would personally like to congratulate you on embarking this chapter of your life. As I was scrolling through Facebook, I had seen many of you starting different level of educational journey, like beginning college, grad school or children starting another year in school. Whether or not it’s a semester or simply a class, you are bettering yourself. With education being so important because of personal growth or advancing in job title, I wish you the best in what you are studying. We all have different goals and time frames of when we want to accomplish them, so why not congratulation you for sacrificing your sleep, your time watching television, or just doing something other than studying because it’s going to be worth it- this I promise you. And many people may not agree with you going back to school because it’s more debt you are adding, but you have to make some sacrifices in order to be a different person right? If there’s not a lot people supporting you, just know you have someone behind you, cheering you on, giving you that extra little push. There will be though times and rough nights, but it will all be worth it. Someone is looking up to you; you’re inspiring them now, later, or in the future. So please keep going when you start to question why you began in the first place.

For those in school, I hope you have an awesome semester or year.

For those starting a new craft, I hope you continue to have the same spark when the flames start to fade.

For those entering in a new management, don’t forget about those who are in the position you were once in. Do your job, but remain humble.

And for those still trying to figure things out, congratulations for not giving up when you have every right to. Keep going, you got it! You’re going to get there.

 

photo taken from google.

Delivery: The Price Tag

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Is there a price for what you decide to do?

One time in our lives, we are told to go to school and get a degree. But we don’t think about the aftermath, the consequences, or the benefits of this?  One way of thinking about these three things are this:

The aftermath

You are more knowledgeable than when you first began college a few years ago. You take many classes, some are for your required major and some are just for fun. You become more wiser because you study or new skills that probably won’t help you now but later down the road. You eventually become an asset to the company you work for and more.  You have something with your name attached to it and you’re more marketable in a sense than a person who knows something but don’t have the credentials to back them up. You have an experience that some don’t have, going to parties on Thursday’s night just to get enough sleep to make to that eight o’clock you don’t know why you register for. You meet a lot of different people, who some become your friends for a lifetime. You learn about yourself through the hard times and struggle. You learn about the sacrifices of doing something now versus later.

The Consequences

You have done the easy part, seating through many lectures, reading boring books, taking endless notes. You went on to complete another degree. Congratulations! You began looking for jobs, but now there are consequences. You have to tools to be successful, but you don’t have the experience needed to jump on board. You’re overqualified for entry level positions and you’re worth way more than the pay being offered. What do you do? I say take the job because you never know what could happened and when. Also, there’s debt- the ones you have to pay back. Some people aren’t fortunate enough to have a job either right after college or within six months of graduating, then Sallie Mae sends you your first bill without any hesitation. What do you do? Take a job paying minimum wage? See if you can go back to doing something while you were in college so you are able to pay this bill and the many others that comes with being an adult? Will we ever get out of those?

The benefits

Getting a degree can help lead to another road or avenue you have never thought of. It can open many doors with time. I had a brief conversation with one of my managers at work. I asked how did he get into a manager position. I thought everyone had to have a degree in something unless they worked their way up to that point. Long story short, he graduated with a psychology degree, but during his time in college, he was a waiter. He enjoyed getting tips while doing this. After college, he became a salesperson, enjoyed doing that for way. Later, he began his master degree as a counselor. I don’t think he finished, but he did say he had a lot of experience counseling and talking with people. And now, his job description states for him to talk to a lot of people. So although he is in the food industry, having a degree helped. Not saying he wouldn’t be where he’s at without a degree because it is still possible.

I’m not saying don’t get a degree because I have one.  I’m just saying there’s a price tag for every “delivery” or package you encounter in life. Make decisions, make mistakes, and have fun, but don’t make the same mistake twice because of the decisions you once decided to make.